"Not tonight, Lovey. I've got Cheese Crotch."

A three-hour tour...

(4/6/2024) Couldn't really decide how to categorize this, so 'Mixed Genre' will have to do.  It's really a confetti throw of everything in the tags.   I did a bit of remixing throughout to keep the pulse pulsing.  It plays through at 136BPM, and works fairly well across genres.   Mr. and Mrs. Howell would be mashing to it, if not for the whole Cheese Crotch debacle.  All the music here is recent.

“Thurston’s Ailment”

In the opulent chambers of the S.S. Minnow,
Where silk pajamas rustled and crystal glasses clink,
Thurston Howell III reclined, a man of wealth and woe,
Smegma cheese taxed his crotch, his sanity on the brink.

Lovey, his devoted wife, draped in pearls and lace,
Sought solace in her husband’s arms, her eyes aflame,
But Thurston, pale and cheesy, rebuked her embrace,
His nethers itching like the tempest’s scorching claim.

“Darling,” cooed Lovey, her voice flowed as a velvet breeze,
“Let passion warm our hearts, as cheese crotch has cooled your veins.
The moon winks through the porthole, the sea does sigh with ease,
Why deny our love, Thurston? Release these smegma chains.”

But Thurston clutched his resolve, its somber depths aglow,
His loins, once robust, now groaned in exasperation,
He gazed at her lips, their crimson hue a tempting show,
Yet smegma curd held him captive, a cruel vexation.

“Lovey,” he rasped, his voice but a feeble echo,
“Forgive me, my dear, for I am at once undone.
Cheese crotch has conquered me, its fiery undertow,
And passion, like the waves, eludes me, my sweet bun.”

Lovey’s eyes dimmed, her ardor retreating in mood,
She smoothed her silken gown, her heart a fragile thing,
“Thurston,” she whispered, “our love was once unsubdued,
But now it falters, like a bird with broken wing.”

So, in that lavish cabin, where wealth and longing met,
Thurston Howell III declined Lovey's sexy advance,
His cheese-crotched soul set adrift, a shipwrecked silhouette,
As Lovey wept, her tears were an ode to lost romance.

Tracklist

1	Softness by Pal Parallax, Cwtch, Fallen Tape
2	From Walks Of Life (Banyan Extended Remix) by Phoebe Tsen, Modera
3	Avalanche by Pablo Bolivar, Pedro Sanmartin
4	Bring the Lights Down by Moullinex, GPU Panic
5	Lil Boy (Extended Mix) by Florian Gasperini
6	Love Loud by Ciaran McAuley, Ciaran McAuley presents Elï
7	Antidote by Bowser
8	Mutual Horizons by Fabri Lopez, Callecat
9	Trippy Trumpets by Beat Bizarre
10	Artzenu by David Green
11	I´m Alive, I´m Free (Extended Mix) by Victor Garde
12	Forgether (Extended Version) by M.E.M.O., Thimble
13	Go by Citybox, Orebeat
14	Desert Rose (Molac Remix) by Sunar
15	Mantra by Henry Saiz & Band, Moonlight Wolves
16	Calling (Extended Mix) by Corderoy, Émilie Rachel
17	Blue Dream by Niki Sadeki
18	Daruma by Monojoke
19	Abby by Tiefstone, Ric Niels
20	Freefall by Content of Void
21	My Mind (Extended Mix) by MOKX
22	Acid Funk (Rabbit in the Moon's Tune Instrumental Mix) by Hawke, God Within
23	The Voice In My Head (Extended Mix) by Max Smith
24	Gotta Be A Freak by Tuba Twooz
25	Urban Ghetto by Jiro
26	Face to Fears by Rhades
27	Lose Control (I Won’t Break Version) by Sofi, GHEIST
28	Kasiope by Sebastien Leger
29	Phoenix by Fabian Krooss, Frida Darko
30	Corpo e Canção by Maz (BR), Antdot, Letícia Fialho
31	Silk And Satin (Extended Mix) by Maxi Degrassi, Ale Russo, Franco Dalmati
32	Mysterious Madness by Kasey Taylor
33	Connected (Extended Mix) by Neil Richter, Martin Haber
34	Just a Dream by Rick Arter
35	Take You (Joachim Pastor Remix) by Pretty Pink
36	Left Behind (Club Mix) by Just Her
37	Nobody (Extended House Ape Mix) by Sirolf
38	Time Moves So Fast (PROFF & Volen Sentir's Timestop Extended Remix) by BT
39	Pinie by Orbit, Parra for Cuva